In The us, poets are held in this kind of reduced esteem that even the most Honored Representative from Nigeria will not bother scamming us. Society says to us what Dermot Mulroney states to Julia Roberts in “My Greatest Friend’s Wedding,” that we are “The pus that infects the mucus that cruds up the fungus that feeds on the pond scum.”
Even remaining cheated by Mr. Honorable Minister, however, is preferable to the poetry scams that have proliferated. Wind Publications’ Literary Scam manual has this to say:
Hidden between the numerous sponsors of reputable literary contests advertised on the world wide web lurk those people who treatment minor about literature, its viewers, or authors. These corporations and people today exist exclusively for income by their so-named crafting or poetry contests. Often you may obtain these “cost-free” poetry contests lavishly marketed in your local newspaper.
There is a cottage sector of composing scams perpetuated by pus poetry pimps, the main amid them Global Library of Poetry, aka Noble Home Press, aka Poetry.com. They advertise in United states of america Weekend and the Penny Saver–nicely, not the Penny Saver, but they may possibly as very well, due to the fact that sums up their viewpoint of poets. If you have observed the advertisements or gained a letter that says, “Congratulations, your poem has been picked for our upcoming anthology,” congratulations, you happen to be becoming cheated.
Like so-named modeling companies or “talent agents” who prey on the dreams of nubile women seeking to be the upcoming Lindsay Lohan, poetry pyramid techniques exploit the selection 1 hope of writers: publication, and a lot more importantly, recognition. Numerous fantastic Net websites this sort of as Preditors and Editors and PoetryNotCom detail the outrageous mechanics of poetry “anthology” cons, and the infamous Wergle Flomp Poetry Contest by WinningWriters.com cheerfully skewers self-importance poetry contests and the submicroorganisms who perpetuate them.
How do you spot a poetry rip-off? Glimpse for…
1. Crazy pie in the sky prize quantities.
I ran the DeAnn Lubell Skilled Writers’ Competitiveness. Most poetry contests with looking at fees fork out, at most, $1,000, and that’s for a e-book-length manuscript of poetry. For a one poem, the very first prize pot is normally a whopping $100, $150 tops. A $20 million prize, as dangled by Noble Household, is a major crimson flag. Oh, and no one particular ever offers poets a opportunity to get a entire world cruise. It is ordinarily assumed that we sail all-around the entire world on a Mark Twain raft, a sampan, or a Hemingway skiff.
2. No contest charges.
Wergle Flomp is the only “F*r*e*e” poetry contest. Now, persons on the Internet and toiling poets in a natural way leap at the term “F*r*e*e”. But, like victims of those people modeling scams, you may end up paying for your second of bargain hunting. Modeling ripoffs want you to work with a individual photographer (normally faux European). Similarly, poetry scams won’t permit you even see your poem in print until you pay out for the anthology. When you do pay out for the anthology, you could question if you just bought a copy of the Penny Saver, due to the fact your poem appears like it was crammed on to the webpage to make home for the “Location the Distinction” puzzle and the grownup communicate strains. Then there are these awards banquets…
3. Phony awards banquets.
10 years in the past, no joke, I been given a mailing from Well known Poets Culture that lured me to fork more than the dollars to show up at an awards banquet and convention. If I compensated my money, I could be a part of the elite corporation of poets this kind of as…Ted Lange of “Like Boat” fame. Who understood Isaac the bartender was a closet Langston Hughes? Plus, I could win $6,000 in doorway prizes. Now, if you’ve got at any time attended a poetry reading through, in particular in coffeehouses, you know that poets wear their vow of poverty as proudly as a Che Guevara T-shirt. Just the assumed of winning $25 in a poetry slam produced my fellow poets and me weep extra cathartically than the contestants on “Offer or No Offer.” And Ted Lange usually would not go to.
4. Questionable popularity or none at all.
In poetry, if you never have Nikki Giovanni, Czeslaw Milosz or Donald Corridor front and heart in your magazine, additionally several angsty Eastern European poets, would-be poets fall you like Oprah dropped James Frey. Appear for journals, publishers and poetry contests that publish and are judged by literary lions. It is really Bukowski or bust. And when Poetry.com won’t be able to determine out that Dave Barry and 20/20 are hoaxing them, the joke’s on Poetry.com. Likewise, if a vanity press costs you $3,000 to $8,000 to publish your collection of poems, and the major author promoted by Façade Push is an eighteen-yr-previous crafting poems from the issue of view of her liver, conserve your income for the hard do the job of essentially submitting your poems to Threepenny Assessment, or literary journals or publishers that you examine about in Writer’s Market or Poets and Writers.
5. Marketing in newspapers and shiny journals.
True poetry contests you should not market in Usa Weekend–guaranteed, United states Weekend could sponsor a teen essay contest, but poetry advertisers? Fail to remember it. Men and women don’t select up United states of america Weekend as a literary publication, even even though United states of america Weekend functions guides and authors. If you see a mass call for poets in a mass sector journal, give it a miss. Authentic poetry contests get deluged with submissions as it is. They will not have to have to fish for a lot more.
6. Sending you a letter of acceptance for a contest you are unable to remember moving into or a publisher you won’t be able to don’t forget distributing to.
I admit, as a writer I have trouble holding monitor of what I sent to whom and when–we go into creating to prevent paperwork, not do it, even though when we are not in the mood, reorganizing data files quickly turns into as tempting as a working day in Cancun. Fortunately, Writer’s Industry characteristics a Submission Tracker, and some enterprising bloggers truly article their submission routine to make the relaxation of us sigh in unorganized envy. If you can not locate the go over letter/e-query in your file cupboard, on your laptop or computer, on your Zip drive (you do again up, ideal?), or in your Despatched folder, likelihood are you never ever submitted to Countrywide Library of Poetry or Wordscum.com (apologies if there in fact is a Web internet site out there named Wordscum.com). Indeed, immediately after 300 rejections, having an acceptance letter might be a enhance, but to misquote Groucho Marx, think two times prior to you accept just any club that will have you as a member. Aim better. Think about if JK Rowling had just explained, “All suitable, I’ll pay out a million lbs . to have a handful of hundred copies of Harry Potter for my good friends and family to acquire.”
7. Promising to get your guide or handsome anthology on the bestseller rack in bookstores.
Range a person, PoetryNotCom is one of the quite a few web sites reporting that this claim is bogus. Variety two, most people today who go into a bookstore to study poetry in all probability can find the poetry part blindfolded and commit a few several hours debating the symbolism in Whitman in excess of a decaf skinny latte at Borders Café. Amount two, while having your ebook in bookstores is nevertheless the gold regular, Amazon.com and on-line retailing make it effortless for even the tiniest push to get textbooks noticed. Quantity three, bookstores are so glutted with stock that they can’t even inventory the POD books, enable by itself nearly anything from ScamPoet Publishing or Poetry.com, and bookstores will not acknowledge vainness press publications. For that make a difference, no poet besides Ludacris or Jimmy Carter will conclude up on the bestseller list in a bookstore. We really don’t go into poetry to be wealthy. We go into poetry to sound our barbaric yawp…and a fellowship or two is wonderful, also.
Quite a few beginning poets get bilked, but you you should not have to. If you happen to be clever and ambitious, you’ll be a successful poet with tons of lierary publications and e-zines bearing your byline. Poetry.com and its ilk will normally be “The pus that infects the mucus that cruds up the fungus that feeds on the pond scum.”